Kitty Logic

I'm afraid this will be a short-ish post, as inspiration seems to be a elusive thing to be captured of late.

I stepped out of the bathroom one day to this, and decided to watch quietly as the drama unfolded:

Being given a talking-to

"Maxie, why won't you let jiejie (elder sister) pet you? Jiejie really wants to love you, but you won't even let me touch you. Haven't I given you enough anchovies to warrant some love?" complained Fiona.

"Meow?" came the inquiring reply as Fiona's finger waved entrancingly in front of kitty.

"Yeah, jiejie really likes you. Let jiejie pet, please?" begged the missus.

Hmmm...looks promising?

"Meow, anchovies...." crooned my princess, as she sniffed Fiona's finger, remnants of the scent of the anchovy treat/bribe offered moments ago clinging to it.

"Yes! Come, let jiejie sayang (love) you," squealed Fiona excitedly as she reached out to give a tentative pet.

'nuff said...

Maxie performed the "shrinking cat" routine; ducking her head lower and lower away from Fiona's outstretched finger (yes, just the one!). With head tilting at an angle to keep an eye on the offending limb, chin touching the bottom of the pad and the finger right on the verge of giving that loving stroke, kitty displayed a feat of agility and disappeared from her perch in a blink of an eye, staring up imperiously (yes, it's possible if you're a cat) from the floor.

"Why are you trying to touch me, hooman?" she demanded.

"Why won't you let me touch you?" cried Fiona, clearly irked. She stood up in a huff and stalked out of the room. Kitty stood at the doorway watching her with beady eyes of satisfaction before hopping back on her perch.

I exited the bathroom fully and seated myself upon the missus's vacated chair.

"Maxie," I began.

"Meow?"

"You're a very mean kitty," I chastened her.

"I know right?" she chirruped brightly.

"Can't you not be so mean to Fiona-jiejie?" I demanded.

"Uhm....nope?" she responded, somewhat cattily.

"Whyever not?" I asked, incredulous.

"Cos that would just make her worship me more!"

I was left speechless at this exchange.

"Fine, I'll ask Fiona-jiejie to stop giving you treats then," I finally replied, getting up.

"Huh? Why?" Maxie asked, bemused.

"You know why!"

No more treats? Egad!

It's been Day Two, she still hasn't repented. We shall see...

On that note, it's been a fun 2014, happy new year, dear readers!

Curious Kitty

As I wasn't able to procure (Her Highness didn't deign to provide) any good pictures in the past week, I shall resort to a completely textual post this entry instead.

Fiona finagled her way into adorning the bedroom with a gigantic monster teddy bear. In her absence, the over-sized soft toy has pride of place on the side of bed I don't sleep on. A few days back, I was giving the comforter a good airing, leaving it to settle flatly above the bed, or that's how it usually goes. This time, the bear was buried underneath.

Being a lazy bugger, I left things as they are and went about my business. A bell jingled, and I glimpsed Maxie on the bed, in search of a comfy spot for a well-deserved cat nap after a tiring cat nap in the hall. Suddenly, she froze! What was this lump underneath the comforter that was NOT her?

The not-so intrepid feline inched her way forward towards the lump, and tentatively gave it a pat only to immediately duck backwards as though afraid the lump would pat her back! Hmm...no response. Perhaps another pat? On went her paw, floating in the air slowly followed by a lightning fast pat and retreat.

I was in stitches at this point, but worried for the sheets; I hurriedly flipped the covers over and showed kitty...ta-daa! Teddy bear! She gave its foot a sniff of disgust and curled up in a sunny spot, looking for all the world like the last 2 minutes never occurred.

~~~

The next day, a plaintive mewing inundated the apartment complex on my wing. That's right, not just my unit, but the entire apartment. For the life of me I couldn't determine where it was coming from. I deduced that someone must have recently obtained a kitten, and it was suffering from separation anxiety, poor mite.

While I walked back and forth my home, I finally realised that I had a furry critter underfoot. Maxie was tailing me determinedly, trying to figure out where I had hidden this kitten (I had previously fostered 3 kittens, then 1, and helped catsit another).

I picked my little princess up to give her some tender loving reassurance, but she just growled out the window.

"WHERE IS SHE?" she demanded in a tone reminiscent of the Dark Knight to the Joker.

I hurriedly put her down, when she promptly ran to the washing room and peered out the balcony, trying in vain to figure out how I managed to float a kitten on thin air.

"I swear, I haven't got a kitten this time," I protested, to no avail.

Unable to find just where the kitten was secreted, Maxie took up position at my bedroom door, ears perked up in the alert position, picking up every subtle nuance...except the kitten's mewing went on and on and on and on (heartbreakingly so), and soon even my guard kitty gave it up and curled up next to the teddy bear for some sleep.

I guess being on the alert is just too exhausting for a kitty whose job was to be "on sleep" for 18 hours a day.

Til next week, dear readers!

Santarina Kitty

Christmas is around the corner! There was a huge book sale here in KL that we just had visit and purchase gifts of literature...for ourselves!

After our (Fiona's and my) first haul from the book sale, we were too tired to do much sorting of our purchases other than to stack them up and fit them in a corner. While stacking, the kitty supervisor sauntered over...

Part of our haul...

You left a few books in the bag! Hey, who are you calling a nosey posy?

Good job, you should read more, and get me more plastic bags!

I hastened to shoo kitty out of the plastic bags in case anything untoward were to happen to my favourite feline.

"Mrowll...you didn't get ME anything?" she wailed.

"Uhm...it's a book fair, baby," I replied shiftily.

"Meow! You don't love me anymore!" she cried and fussed the whole night. 

My heart was breaking, so the very next day, I went out and picked up something for her. Thinking that as Christmas was coming soon, I'd get her something that was "in theme" with the coming holidays.

"Maxie! Daddy's home! Look what Daddy got you!" I sang as I walked through the door. My furry princess strolled out of my her bedroom and sniffed at the bag haughtily.

What IS this?

You're kidding right?

Imma gonna kill you...

I must look ridiculous, do not even dream about putting this on the blog!

Kitty jumping away the moment I took it off

"What's the matter, Maxie? Don't you like it?" I queried the twitchy-tailed kitty.

"Do NOT EVER, buy me things like that again!" she snapped. 

"Not even if you begged me and said I don't love you?" I asked and blinked innocently at her.

If you even think about putting that ridiculous outfit on me again, I shall rip all YOUR clothes to shreds. Miao!

I hastened to bribe Her Irate Highness with treats, and stowed the (too short) outfit away, safely out of sight.

I'm too kitty for my shirt, too kitty for my shirt, too kitty by far!

Kitty Travel Companion

Whassup peoples!

I had to attend a cousin's wedding over the weekend, so the blog is a bit delayed due to traveller's fatigue (yes, I made that up, so sue me).

Anyway, as it was an extended trip, we decided to make a drive out of it. So the missus and I, bundled with the princess, made our way south in my trusty automobile. All pics courtesy of Fiona, my valiant photographer!

Ooh, I haven't been here for awhile!

It took Maxie a good while to get her nerves under control before she ventured out of her bag, and onto the cushion mat. The little kitty really does detest being brought out of her comfort zone.

What's on the left?

What's on the right?

Do I know you?

We sped merrily along, and in time kitty got over her jitters. As was her wont, she started complaining when cars overtook us on the fast lane...

Go faster!

Daddy, you do know that EVERYBODY is driving faster than you, right? RIGHT??? (inset: Fiona's hand calming the irate kitty down)

"Daddy! You're embarrassing me! Go faster, please?" whined Maxie forlornly.

"Maxie, I'm at the speed limit. I can't go any faster or I'll get fined!" I protested indignantly.

"Fine!" mrowled Maxie.

10 minutes later...

Are we there yet?

Fiona and I ignored her sulks and mutterings as best as we could, making conversation to ease the boredom. Undeterred, the intrepid feline sought to engage our attention using some acrobatics.

I am tiger, hear me roar!

Rawr!

Are you not entertained, hoomanz?

We ignored her, and no doubt this triggered the next set of antics.

Old MacDonald had a farm...and on his farm he had a cat.

With a meow meow here...

...and a meow meow there

Here a meow...

...there a meow

Everywhere meow meow!

"Maxie, that's enough! You're annoying me!" I snapped, annoyed.

"But I'm bored!" she replied.

Seething, I put on some songs, choosing some nice slow ballads to try to lull the cabin fevered kitty to sleep. This was a mistake, as she decided to sing-along with off-key mews, making a tragic comedy of the situation. In desperation, I put on some rock songs instead...

Me likes rock songs....

So soothing and relaxing...

Zzz

 
Okay....so that was interesting. When I dropped Fiona off at the customs, this sight greeted us:

Too much rock..can't wake....say...bye...zzzzz

It was in this comatose state that I brought kitty home to mum's, and unloaded everything and cat into the house. Right before I tried to settle down for nap, I heard a plaintive meow.

Daddy, can we go for a car ride again?

Maxie Loves New Stuff!

Maxie finally got used to the new stuff at home, and was able to settle down on the floor mats without trying to "make sure" they're dead.

Soft floor mat

However, poor kitty was not allowed any respite, as I popped open the box of toys that her godmother Rainbow sent and out came a replica of one of her favourite kittenhood toys: a fluffy tail wand! (The original one did not survive kittenhood...)

Omg omg omg!

 

*grab*

*pounce!*

My little princess was transported! This toy was something she just could not get bored of. All it takes is a human's nudge to move it a milimetre, and kitty would come running. Just when I thought she'd be tired out from playing (I know I was!) and made to keep the wand, she'd come begging for more with her "I want that" chirrup. Geesh...this was a worse addiction than her pink kung fu feather wand!

While leaving her alone with her toys, I attached a wall hook to hang my new 2015 calender from the 5 dollar store. Kitty thought there was a bug on the wall and stopped her play to stare at it and made her "hunting" noise when she sees bugs or geckos.

"Daddy! There's a BUG on the wall!"

I held her up ala Simba in The Lion King so she could sniff at the new wall attachment, after which Maxie left it off the hook *snicker*. 

Speaking of shopping and new stuff, the gf loaded up on those feminine stuff like nail polish and things that I know not of, being a male and all that. We left it in the empty guest room, now that my good-for-nothing tenant has moved out, thinking no one would care about those stuff being in there until she returns home...

"Did you get these for me? I've always wanted feminine products!"

"Maxie! Those are Fiona-jiejie (big sister)'s stuff! Come away" I said.

"What do you mean, they're NOT for me?"

Kitty was acting all possessive and guard kitty-ish, so we left her alone until she got bored with things.

It's been 24 hours, still not bored. Hmm...

Maxie - The Sheet Change Supervisor

I opted to change my bedsheets the other day, and it proved to be more of a chore than I had expected. Now, a normal person changing the bedsheets would more or less follow this workflow:

• Discard pillow cases > place pillows off the bed somewhere > take off the current sheets and comforter cover > put on new sheets and comforter cover > put on new pillow cases > replace pillows on bed

However, for this particular cat slave, the workflow is somewhat altered:

• Remove cat from bed > discard pillow cases > move cat from chair to put pillows on chair > move cat from bed > take off the current sheets > disentangle cat's claws from comforter > move cat to cat tree > remove comforter > ignore death stare from cat > tuck a corner of new sheet into bed > tuck second corner in > tuck third corner in > tuck fourth corner in > notice cat is missing > notice a lump in the middle of the bed under the sheet > remove sheet to see cat sleeping underneath > remove cat from bedroom > close the door > ignore piteous mewling > put on new sheets > put on new pillow cases > replace pillows on bed

Kitty supervising sheet change

Kitty deciding to get involved in sheet changing

Kitty realizing paw is stuck in comforter

Kitty wondering if I should change the "sheets" on cat tree

So, once that arduous task was done, I decided to change the floor mats too. 

Kitty wrestling new floor mat

After straightening the floor mat for a minimum of four times, I gave it up as a lost cause and left Maxie to it. I sat down and took a much needed breather. Minutes later, I decided to check on the busybody kitty...

These sheets are NAIS

"So you like the new sheets then?" I asked her.

"Uh-huh...."

Satisfied that her highness approved, I went for a shower and came out to this:

Zzz............

I snuck out of home without waking the princess, and it seems to be kitty sleeping season as I looked about for my stray kittens and found them thus:

*snuggle*

A capital idea! I forewent feeding them, returned to my room and joined Maxie in the comfy bed. Goodnight!